Today is a rare quiet afternoon. Both the kids are taking a nap in separate rooms (of course) and that leaves me all by myself. So used to always being on the go, the first couple of minutes are spent picking up toys lying on the floor. Now what? I ask myself, let me prep some dinner while the kids are sleeping, comes an auto-answer somewhere from the back of my mind. Half an hour gone and that is also done. Now what? And the mind is blank. I am kind of shocked. Don’t I always complain that there are a thousand things I have to do or aspire to do but can’t because of being occupied with the kids. Why can’t I think of anything to do today?
It is bizarre, really. There are a dozen books lying unread in the bottom drawer of my dresser, also a couple of sewing projects idling around nearby and yet there isn’t a single book I want to pick up and read. Not in the mood to use the needle and thread either.
And the funny thing is at this moment, I am neither sad nor happy nor thoughtful. I sit on the couch watching the trees outside, fiddling with the laptop at the same time.
Astonishingly, words come easily on the electronic paper from nowhere as I write and gaze at the beautiful white flowers outside, alternatively. A little away there are pink flowers on a tree and I think when did these arrive? The pink Tulips visit us once a year for a short month of spring and before you have a chance to admire them, they wither away like rest of the leaves. As hard it is to ignore nature’s wonders right outside your window, being caught up in a routine can turn you blind to everything else.
Sitting unaccompanied is a luxury these days. I don’t know if I should but I am enjoying it.
There are moments when you are alone but not lonely. Those extraordinary moments of tranquility are not for reflection of the past. They are also not to be wasted on drawing up ambitious plans for the future. Peace, like every other emotion needs to be embraced and experienced to the fullest.
I look up to the clear blue sky, for it hasn’t rained today, then again towards the tulips. Beauty, it has been said, cannot be defined. I try and give up.
A quaint afternoon, a restful mind and a chance to soak up nature’s colors at its loveliest. I have been blessed today, now I truly know.